So...old news....but I am STILL the worst blogger in the history of the world! I always say I will do better, and so far I have failed miserably at that. However, the only way to get better at something is to work at it, so here we are! Having read my past posts, which was a VERY long time ago, I have a lot to catch you up on....so here we go...
I worked at American Heritage Academy another year after my last post. Sadly, the dance team didn't make it another year, but I had the incredible honor of being the Student Council advisor again. I have to say that the students in that council are some of the most amazing students I have ever met. They are hard working, dedicated, and willing to do whatever needs to be done to make their school and community better. I also worked another year in the Title 1 program. I love working with students in this capacity. Every student learns differently, and it is so rewarding to be able to find that particular style of learning and finally see that moment of understanding. There is nothing like it! That is why I have chosen to go to school to become a speech therapist. I cannot wait to be able to continue helping students succeed!
For Christmas last year, my family surprised me with tickets to visit Angie again. I was thrilled! Knowing how very impatient I can be, my family made the wise choice to schedule the trip for the next week or so to avoid having to deal with my countdown for too long (smart people). When the day finally came, I could hardly stand it! I had a wonderful time on my visit, and as always it ended too soon. About a month after I got home I decided to apply for the Disney College Program. I had applied twice since the end of my last program, and each time I never made it past the online interview. I figured, what could it hurt? I would apply, not make it past the online interview, and that would be the end of it. Shockingly, I made it to the phone interview. I was stunned! I prayed a great deal and felt it was the right decision to go ahead with the phone interview. The day of the interview came, and I was a mess, and when it was over I spent the next week it seemed going over my answers wishing I would have said this, or not said that. A week or so later, I got the email saying I had been accepted for a merchandise role and got my check-date. I was so excited! I couldn't wait to go back and relive the wonderful experiences I had during my first program! My family was, as always, incredibly supportive and excited for me. They helped me over the next six months to prepare to leave. Mom and Dad would watch Olivia until I got my own place, I packed up my room and had everything ready to go. My whole family came for a weekend long birthday bash, and I was so spoiled. I felt so loved! However, a couple months before I was about to leave, I got this sinking feeling every time I thought about going. I dreaded the day I was supposed to leave, and would cry at the drop of a hat. I tried to hide this, but I am not sure I did a great job. I kept telling myself it was just nerves, and would try to focus on the positive memories I had from my last program. No matter what I did, I couldn't shake the feeling. I prayed a lot to help me deal with these feelings, and told myself that as soon as I got to Disney, I would remember all the good things and be fine! I asked my Dad for a blessing a few days before I left, and in the blessing he asked that I could know that my decision was the right one, which is exactly what I should have been asking all along. They day came, I said bye to everyone (which killed me), and left with my Mom and Grandma to Florida. We wanted it to be like my last program, and I was so grateful for their support! We were smarter this time and left a few days before my check-in day so we could try and hit all the parks instead of just Magic Kingdom. When we pulled up to the hotel, my Grandma went inside to check-in and my Mom and I waited in the car. She turned to me and told me that she felt like she needed to say that if I woke up on my check-in day feeling like it wasn't what I wanted to do, we would get me a ticket home no questions asked. She said she didn't know why, but felt I needed to hear it. To be honest, that was exactly what I needed to hear. While I had a great time with my Mom and Grandma, I was having a hard time enjoying the parks. The sinking feeling got worse, I was irritable, nauseous, couldn't sleep, and though I tried really hard, unpleasant to be around. Long story shorter, check-in day came and I felt like I needed to go home. After a lot of praying and talking with my parents, I knew that staying was not right. I contacted Disney and let them know that I was sorry, but could not participate in the program. I let family know I would be coming home, and broke the news to Angie. That day, I was able to enjoy myself and felt a million times better!
Honestly, I have no idea what happened. When I first applied and took the position, I felt so good. I was excited and eager to go. While I felt better having chosen to come home, I felt very guilty as well. Everyone had spent so much time, energy, and money getting me to Florida and I felt like I had thrown it back in their faces by coming home. I still feel that guilt, but I am so grateful I listened and came home. I live in a new town (closer to my family than Florida), just got a job, and am looking forward to getting into the YSA branch here and starting school. I am so excited for the holidays, and though I still feel a little sad when I see pictures of friends in the park, I love being close to my family. Just this weekend I got snuggles from the nieces and, honestly, that beats going to the parks any day!!
